Richard Cheese

the place I was talking about was Stiers

I used to bounce at a few bars around Bakersfield in my early 20's. At this point, I was bouncing at the Black Angus. The DJ was having car problems, and asked me for a ride. It was no big deal, as it wasn't out of the way to pick him up. However, he lived in a neighborhood known as Oildale, at the time. Oildale has the reputation for being meth lab capital of Kern County, as well as a blue collar area. We also have a lot of oil fields around bako, hence the name oildale. anyway, i digress. I go to pick him up, and we are running hella late. As he comes out of his house, and gets in my car, his across the street neighbor, who works in the oil fields, pulls up in a giant A- Frame truck, a 5500 chassis, with a boom on the back. My friend tells me to watch what happens next. I inform him that we are going to be late. He tells me it will be worth it. Anyway, the guy sits in his truck for a couple of minutes, just staring out the windshield. He finally opens the door, and falls flat out on his face, about a 4 ft drop. He kind of starts crawling toward the front tire, and at this point, I can tell that he is hammered drunk. He gets his hands on the tire, pulls himself up, and starts patting himself down. he finally pulls a pack of smokes out of his greasy coveralls, puts one in his mouth, backwards, searches the same way for a lighter, and lights the wrong end of his smoke. He takes a couple of drags, and the filter starts to flame up, and catches his hair on fire to which he responds by open hand slapping his head. Finally, the fire is out and he begins to walk up to his house. he is all over the yard, and into the flowerbeds, due to his intoxication, and can barely walk, let alone drive oil field machinery. He gets to the porch, and I don't know how, but negotiates the steps, and gets to the front door. This house had a cooler, so there was a screen door on the front door, while the actual front door was open, to allow the cooler to work properly. He opens the door, walks in, and in 5 4 3 2 1..........you hear his wife/girlfriend, whatever she was start yelling at him. "You %$#$$$$#$43 A$$hole, we have 4 kids, and all you do is get drunk. You worthless $$##$#$$$%$$54 son of a %$###$. " etc etc Here he comes back out the front door, and flings the screen door wide open. As he gets to the porch steps, he slows down, I guess to attempt the steps. As the screen door begins to close, a huge spaghetti boiling pot comes sailing out the front door, and smacks him in the back of the head, as he attempts to place his foot on the first step. This knocks him forward, again, face first, onto the sidewalk. He crawls to the nearest tree, pulls himself up, and continues to stumble to the side of his truck, does the whole smoke routine again, but gets it done right this time, and yells into the house, " Yeah you #$%#ing biotch, I'm an A$$#$#? I was gonna take you to da Sizzler, biotch, but now I'm an A$$$%$$!" needless to say, we were late. HOwever, upon hearing the above story, our manager let us slide that night.

this is how I rolled to the beach not with the door open though, my son had to go to the bathroom.

that is some funny shiat right there, ill tell ya what!! I knew tweakers lost teeth, but didn't know they lost their colons. Can you imagine the intimacy he and his wife has??? They'll be dead before 40.......sad while he was pinching the liquid loaf, you could have showed him the crapper map pete just fabbed up or do what I would have done...just roosted him something fierce, and got the effe outta there.

I know what ya mean Pete. There are sections of Pismo that are very whooped out, that I can see-saw on my DS all day long. I tried it on my neighbor's yfz 450, and about got knocked the effe out. got tossed off the bike, and into a wooden piling used to keep the fence up I will for sure be sticking with the DS. gotta love the couch on wheels spanish lesson: did you know couch is diaper in spanish???? :smoker: I guess you can sit on them both on edit i just read the tweaker liquid loaf post....effen hilarious.....sounded like dude coulda used a few couches!!!

I got to ride a raptor 700 while at pismo, and I think I will stick to my DS. 1. the power is there. maybe a little more thanthe rotax 650, or it could have been that the bike weighs over 100lbs lighter...don't know 2. the stock shocks SUCK..... I hit a g out that i was on all day long on my DS, and I think i injured my liver im not into droppin 7 grrrrrr, only to turn around and have to drop another 15 hundy for decent suspension, then mayber another grandy on a-arms... this summer, Imma go through my DS, get a bigger carb, new paint and plastics, regear, and i will be good.

now that my DS needs the valves adjusted, I like 2 smokes better

I have also heard about the new KTM quad, which will have a 625 motor in it can you say smokin'?????

i have a place like that about a mile away from me, with the locks on the dump station after hours. I saw an empty space :smoker: backed into it real stealthy-like hooked up, and let'r rip even connected my water hose to the quicky flush effe paying to dump your black tank. The place where I bought my trailer from has like 20 free dump sites behind their lot, where they do the PDI's, so, If i hit it :smoker: i said if I hit it. anyway I digress, if I get to it on the way home from an outing, then it is no problem, cause it is on the way from pulling into town from Dumont. b

yeah pete, thanks for finding the states biggest poop holes!!!!!! :smoker: i would hate to see what you located them with :smoker:

This is Bruiser. He is a chocolate lab. I was lucky enough to rescue him from the pound. I was there looking for a neighbors Great Dane that had gotten out, and there was Bruiser. he is a great dog This is Simba, a yellow lab. He was given to us from a friend who was moving to NYC, and was gonna have to keep him chained up in a basement.

is than an effen vacuum cleaner on that kfx???

i am pretty partial to crapper # 3 myself seriously though, the last time I was in dumont, I was impressed with the condition of the pit toilet. no graffitti, nice clean walls. much nicer than the gang graffittied toilets @ oceano

so your the a-hole that stakes out the finger dunes????? :ahhhhh: :ahhhhh:

glad to hear everything went well, and the operation was a success.

reason # 45434544-fjfd4543432933 to have kids they can load the toyhauler for ya....just look out for crayons

under that new CA law, that is a ticketable offense, with no adult supervision.....and if they were supervising him, and ALLOWING HIM to ram...............

sweet...not like youre gonna be hard to miss!!! sat or sun???

i likey those new tow mirrors...i need to get me some for my 03

exactly...gotta pay extra money to recycle so some a$$hat can make money and recycle it??? WTF is that?

i used the search fxn, and ....some friend :ahhhhh:

thanks Gerald!!! you rock man

i have seen it on this site before, or a link to it. i searched to no avail. does anyone have a copy of this map? if so, can you repost please??? thanks.

I have some better, bigger tires now that provide better floatation on the sand. At pismo, we were driving around looking for our neighbors, and my wife was complaining that I was driving too fast with the trailer in-tow. i explained to her that if I slowed down, i would get stuck, and then she said the funniest thing. " you dumbass, youre not even in 4wd."

WE are gonna camp where we did last year. nice and quiet, and our own little piece of the dunes, with no a-holes....cept me